My Gethsemane Year
If I could name this year, I would call it my Gethsemane year. At the beginning of this year, I thought I was losing my mind. Truly, There were days I would wake up and feel like I was walking through fog, surrounded by people, conversations, routines, and yet, completely detached from it all. I could laugh, I could talk, I could show up, but inside I felt empty. And that emptiness terrified me. It wasn’t a loud pain, It was quiet, the kind that sits deep in your chest and refuses to leave. There were nights when I would lie awake, unable to find words for what I was feeling. I just knew that something in me was collapsing, the certainty, the strength, the “I’m okay” mask I had worn for so long. It’s strange how loneliness can exist even when you are surrounded by love. I wasn’t alone in the physical sense, I had people, I had moments, I had noise around me but none of it reached me. I felt like I was watching life through glass: close enough to see it, too far to touch it. And t...